Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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