So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Randomize
