i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Randomize
