There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Randomize
