Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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