Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
