I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
