so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Randomize