i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I have grass duct taped all over my body
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Randomize
