Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
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