So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
