ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
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