i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
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