If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
You are the jesus of drinking
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
