Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
