I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
it's great music for shaving your balls
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
