Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Randomize
