if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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