ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
