Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize