We won't sleep together?
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
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