I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
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