absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
