I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize