She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So much Jack, so little girl.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
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