My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
