I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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