doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
