First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
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