the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.