Texts From Last Night

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  (519): View more from Ontario

  We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents

  (1-519): View more from Ontario

  I'm down.

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  (519): We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents (1-519): I'm down. http://tfl.nu/zb30
  Replies (23) Good night (3167) Bad night (1007)
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday

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  (810): I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday http://tfl.nu/aiy9
  Replies (34) Good night (629) Bad night (6114)
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  (281): View more from Texas

  Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.

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  (281): Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high. http://tfl.nu/02yt
  Replies (19) Good night (3706) Bad night (919)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.

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  (781): I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece. http://tfl.nu/l6if
  Replies (10) Good night (846) Bad night (6309)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...

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  (216): you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito... http://tfl.nu/yq5b
  Replies (9) Good night (4427) Bad night (913)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.

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  (724): Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them. http://tfl.nu/a4j7
  Replies (17) Good night (1059) Bad night (6185)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.

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  (732): Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse. http://tfl.nu/qv1x
  Replies (5) Good night (2775) Bad night (967)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent

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  (301): Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent http://tfl.nu/21ar
  Replies (8) Good night (3276) Bad night (1782)
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  (925): View more from California

  After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome

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  (925): After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome http://tfl.nu/nygq
  Replies (10) Good night (4023) Bad night (1314)
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  (905): View more from Ontario

  We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.

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  (905): We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila. http://tfl.nu/k7ds
  Replies (4) Good night (2034) Bad night (827)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?

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  (704): Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night? http://tfl.nu/zhm8
  Replies (6) Good night (877) Bad night (1995)
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  (415): View more from California

  Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?

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  (415): Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking? http://tfl.nu/sizi
  Replies (5) Good night (1868) Bad night (780)
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.

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  (616): I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers. http://tfl.nu/1m5q
  Replies (0) Good night (580) Bad night (330)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  "He was so not worth staining my backseat for."

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  (720): "He was so not worth staining my backseat for." http://tfl.nu/nr5f
  Replies (3) Good night (333) Bad night (671)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.

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  (850): Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable. http://tfl.nu/it4b
  Replies (5) Good night (951) Bad night (361)

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