If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
