I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
