I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize