She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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