so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
