you win again, gameday.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Randomize
