I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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