Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
