why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
