he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
She needs sedatives and a leash
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
