I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Randomize
