I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Dicks are not precious.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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