Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Randomize
