just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
