Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
