No, drunk sperm still make babies.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
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