Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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