She's JV to your varsity
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
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