I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
