Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
PANTIES FOUND
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