Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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